What do you have to offer?


Are you looking for something, unusual? Something others seem to have but you do not? There is this place, down the hall, near sector twenty-three. You can’t miss it, it has this sort of busy buzzing noise about it. The place has a promise it keeps, what you want we want. What you give, we take. What you receive, has a price. Or so the elderly hamster speaks…

The attendant at the door is a robot that has seen better days, the numbers seem to have faded from his metal husk. His voice box barely functioning, but it manages.


Everyone has a desire, some want snacks, some need supplies. Others, others just want what they wish to have. The price can be candy or sweets, the price can be handmade trinkets or devices found within the bunker. The price could be music, or it could be life…

Everything is this way, for this is how the bunker works. Mysteriously yet simple.


‘How can we assist you?’ This is not the right question. ‘What can we acquire?’ This is more honest. ‘What do you have to offer.’ This is the truth. The Barter Engaged Exporting System, B.E.E.S. was built as a service…


What do you offer today?

Visit the B.E.E.S. Sub Forum on Toysoldiersunite.com

Missed connections

Missed Connections

If one was to open today’s edition of Toymorrow Gazette, you could read a few delicious tales of bunker life. You may even find a story about yourself. Though, there is a section, in the final pages of the paper. Here you can find, the missed connections. Today’s reads as follows.

Two Tuesdays ago we met. We wandered the same hall towards our primary objective. You were going South, I was going North. Our hands brushed against each other, we stopped. You were cool, calm and collected. I a mess, unable to properly function, unable to express in words the sheer amount of electricity I felt from our momentary touch. You were kind, apologetic. I was silent and in awe. I did not get your number, mine is Robot #5683.
Give me a call.

Last month, we crossed wires. We were entangled close together, I was burning up and you were as well. The steam between us was almost unbearable. In the end we struggled to be apart, though in truth. I wish we were still wrapped up together. Each day I think about you, when I look down at my workbench and see the severed cords from our encounter. I hope we run into each other again, look for me. Robot #7855, contact me.

I don’t want to waste anytime, yesterday we met. We had the same shift together at the power station, I was running, you were running. You looked at me and smiled, that brightened up my day tenfold. Today I did not see you, I ran slower than usual, my day was dark even though I work in such a bright place. Maybe you are just sick, maybe you were just a replacement for the day. Maybe one day we will run into each other in the mess hall. My name is Ellie, I’m in hamster bay 15. Catch up with me.



Every day I do the same thing, I wake up and prepare for my daily dealings in the bunker. Every day I do the same thing. Every day, I do something. Today is unlike the other days, today I took a left instead of a right. Today I winded up a different part of the bunker. So I go forward, though something inside tells me to return to my designated path, something tells me I am late to work. I keep going straight, I keep going elsewhere. This part of the bunker is sort of dirty, this part of the bunker is a mess. The lights flicker, on and off. I wonder if this is intentional, something tells me this light needs repairing. I get to work, something is always in need of fixing. The lights are stable. The hall continues, I continue. Unlike the path I take every day, this one is different. There are no speakers in this hall, the hall has no doors and there isn’t a single life form around.

I keep going down the hall, I wonder why there is no place to turn. I don’t look behind me, I can’t look behind me. I think something is behind me. There is wind, wind in the hallway. The hallway has no vents, yet there is wind. I fight the incoming pressure, something tells me to go back and report for work. I ignore that something and continue to defy what lies before me.

This is the end of the hall. There is no door, there is no more wind, there is no life forms around, but there is something behind me. Something says I should turn around slowly, I can no longer defy that something. Slowly I turn, I turn to see nothing. Yet something is behind me, but there is nothing but a dead end. There is something wrong, something needs to be fixed. Something is always in need to be fixed.

Excuse me

I should first start off by informing you about my home.

Welcome to the Bunker. I live here with many of my comrades and other creatures.  Some much larger than my kind, just so you know. I am a hamster after all. Though you may be wondering how I am communicating with you, it is quite simple. I am intelligent, I live with humans that build robots for fun, of course I can communicate with you.  Oh! A sunflower seed… Wait, back to the topic at paw.

The Bunker, larger and ever expanding. Though to us, the sole workforce that keeps everything going. Everything in here is small. We have a break room, a communal bedding sector for rest and the wheel room.

Wired Hamster

Us hamsters power everything, everything. The humans don’t exactly get that, the robots really don’t get that. Why can’t they get that? I smell popcorn… Right. I forgot to introduce myself.

My name is George, I am the elected king of the hamsters. I used to live with one of the humans here in the bunker, but it was  time for me to venture and make a name for myself.

In any case, it is a pleasure to meet your acquaintance. Though, I do forget why we were talking in the first place. Oh yes, that’s right. I just stopped you in the hallway.

Well, have a good day!

Don’t forget to drop off some almonds in the break room.